I AM TIRED

Am I getting tired?
Chirping of the birds,
days after nights,
and
nights after days,
penetrating through
window panes,
would not last much.
From life
as if I am fired.
Am I getting tired?

Gaping at the half moon,
Oh! Moon,
Sun after Moon,
and
Moon after Sun,
showering diamond drops
through the eyes of sky.
May be tomorrow or thus,
Or, if I am admired.
Am I getting tired?

Vying with that banyan tree,
which has seen,
Spring after Rain,
and
Rain after Spring,
Unchanged, unlike chameleon,
through the tilting of leaves.
Shadow to be hired.
Am I getting tired?

Swimming in the standstill lake,
Or dead-body on an ice cake.
Resting after being tired.
Tired of having done
unwanted unwillingly.
Tired of having seen
things at wrong places.
Tired of having behaved differently, unwillingly.
Tired of admiring
the wrong.
Tired of having
Pretended, willingly.
Tired of Things,
People and Places.
Tired of Everything, Everybody.

I can feel
The melting ice,
without any prejudice.
I would wake up tomorrow.
That tomorrow which
never comes.
That tomorrow which
never dies.

But not today.
Fearing to be fired.
Today I am tired.
I am really tired.

(19th Feb 1998 at 5:30 pm, Qr No 29: Shercol: Kanglung: Bhutan: while in fever)